I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Randomize
