Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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