Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
You smell like stripper and shame
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
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