4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
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