Why are handjobs necessary in class?
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.