If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Randomize
