My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Sorry about my life...
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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