Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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