i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
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Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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