I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
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Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize