its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
