my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
