Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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