i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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