Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
please come you make the beer taste better
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Randomize