Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
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