Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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