Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Everyone says I win the strip club
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Randomize
