Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Randomize