your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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