Screwed.edu
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
