"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
