so that wasnt chicken after all
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
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a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
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I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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