I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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