At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
