i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
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I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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