It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize