im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
