so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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