Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Randomize
