He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
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