I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
third nipple confirmed
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
