Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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