I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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