So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
