So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
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