Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
