We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
There's always time for handjobs
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
