we're blogging at a bar
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Randomize