We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
