I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Randomize
