I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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