I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
