He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
