If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
