Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
