Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Randomize
