I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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