every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I am one with the molecules
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
