Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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